


A Long, Hard Road

by allixiler



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-01
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:20:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27318385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allixiler/pseuds/allixiler
Summary: After losing a tough case, Rafael comes to comfort you.
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Reader, Rafael Barba/You
Kudos: 8





	A Long, Hard Road

Not guilty. The jury convicted him as not guilty. The bastard that you have been prosecuting for almost 4 months was apparently proven not guilty. The last 4 months of your life had revolved around burying this guy and making sure he never saw the light of day again.

Rafael, being very experienced with this sort of thing, had been so patient with the whole situation. It had taken a toll on your relationship, for sure. The long hours at your office and the early morning hearings had dragged you away from your precious long-time boyfriend, and he had not once complained. He was upset that he hadn’t really seen you and he missed you so badly, but he knew how invested you were in this case. And he knew this guy was guilty and the family needed justice.

He had been keeping up with the case (as as well as prosecuting his own) and he knew that today was closing arguments and verdict day. You had actually let him skim over your closing argument and he seemed very impressed with it. He was nervous for you, but had been confident that you would get the verdict you were fighting for.

It wasn’t until he tuned in to the news channel where his heart sank in his chest when he read the headline. He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. It wasn’t until a few moments later when he saw the man you had been busting your head to put into prison walk out of the courthouse as a free man. He clenched his fists at the sight. He felt a painful sting in his chest when he saw you walk out of the courthouse shortly after looking defeated and angry.

Reporters swarmed you like flies to honey. They bombarded you with questions (none of which you could legally answer). You left them with one simple statement;

“I displayed the evidence, I presented the strongest argument any counselor could argue, and I fought for justice. As far as I’m concerned, that man is still the same guilty bastard from 4 months ago.”

Rafael sighed heavily. He knew you would get in trouble with the DA’s office for talking to the press straight out of a courtroom. He knew you were upset. You had every right to be. He turned off the TV in his office, feeling that familiar queasy feeling he always felt when a criminal got off the hook. He sat at his desk in silence, until he heard a light knock on his door about twenty-five minutes later. He granted access and the door slowly opened. He was a little stunned to see you enter his office.

He had been planning to see you at home later that evening. But truthfully, you needed to see him. Your face was expressionless, much different than what he saw on the news just a half hour or so before. That spooked him. He looked at you and you looked at him silently. Not even sure of what to say. You closed the door behind you;

“Oh, Rafael,” You said feeling your voice begin to shake, “I lost...”

While he wasn’t surprised by this information, it still broke his heart to hear you say it;

“I know, I saw. [Y/N], there wasn’t a thing more you could’ve done.” He said honestly as he got up from his desk to approach you.

If you had lost a more average case, one that didn’t last nearly as long, you would’ve been angry but eventually get over it after a couple of days. This was evoking a totally different feeling. You had been at it for months. Organizing evidence, creating arguments, bringing witnesses. You hadn’t slept a full night in those long months. You had focused on giving this case everything you had. And it still wasn’t enough.

“I missed something,” You said ignoring his statement, “I had to have missed something,”

“Mi amor...” He began to say but your rambling cut him off.

“I had the most solid, concrete argument I’ve ever had. I had the strongest evidence on my side. It should’ve been a textbook win,” You said feeling your hands begin to shake, “There was something the jury needed to hear or see that would’ve changed their decision. There’s no way I should’ve los-“

“[Y/N]!” He said sternly grabbing your shoulders, “Honey, it’s over. There’s nothing left with this case,”

You sighed heavily feeling the tears well in your eyes;

“I thought I had it.” You said feeling dejected.

Rafael took your hands into his, tears streaming your face.

“We all did,” He said wiping the tears from your cheeks, “You did the best you could do. I’m proud of you,”

You didn’t offer any kind of smile and continued to cry;

“Then why do I feel like I didn’t do enough?” You questioned, your voice croaky and cracked.

He sighed softly. A question that every good lawyer asked themself when losing a case. A question he had asked himself many times before;

“Because you’re damn good at what you do. And honestly, you look like exhausted.” He said truthfully.

You sniffed as you let out a weak laugh;

“Oh, what’s worse than a lawyer who’s a sore loser?” You asked jokingly.

Rafael shrugged;

“A lawyer who doesn’t care.” He spoke gently.

He kissed your forehead softly before you moved to sit in the chair in front of his desk. He was right. You were absolutely drained of any and all energy. This had taken absolutely everything out of you and you knew it would take a little while to get back to normal. He returned back to his spot at his desk before speaking again;

“So, what’s your next move?” He asked carefully.

You rested your head in your hand;

“I have been given strict instructions to take the next several weeks off,” You said flatly; “I’ve already gotten an angry phone call about my little outburst I had in front of the reporters.”

He gave a single nod as he continued to listen;

“Will it make you feel better if I tell you, honestly, that I would’ve said the same thing?” He asked.

You laughed weakly;

“No, but I appreciate you saying that.” You replied.

He smiled sadly, looking down at his desk. You needed time to process everything. It was going to be a hard next couple of weeks.

“I don’t know what to do now.” You said simply.

He looked back to you, getting up, and walking back to your side once more;

“You need rest. You need time to bounce back,” He stated; “Then when the time comes, you’ll be back and you’ll be better.”

You nodded with understanding. A few weeks off sounded nice now that you thought about it;

“Thanks, Raf.” 

“For what?” He asked.

“For being there for me. You always know what to say.” 

He grinned sheepishly;

“I don’t know about that, but I do know you’re going to be okay,” He stated; “I love you.”

“I love you too,” You responded immediately; “I guess now it’s time I make it up to you. I’ve canceled on a lot of dates recently.”

He chuckled and shook his head;

“We can worry about that later. For now, I want you to go home. Get some sleep. I’ll see if I can get off early and we can have dinner at home.” He suggested.

That sounded that heaven on Earth. A bed and a good meal. You agreed to that and you were then on route back to your home. He was proud of you and you deserved a break.

He just wished it was under better circumstances.


End file.
